One Step Forward

Yesterday I took a step in the right direction. I woke up and thought it would be another shitty day. I didn’t want to go to school or work and had already written and sent my excuse email into school about why I wouldn’t be in. The plan then was to have a wee and then follow my usual routine when I felt like this. Time to go back to sleep and sleep the day away.

I’m always so happy in my dreams and love remembering them and telling myself them back like a story the next morning. But all they are is dreams. A lot of the time they are about scenarios that have already happened, but how they could have been better, but sometimes they are of things I actually dream of such as winning the lottery, travelling, falling in love etc. The dream world is so much better than the real world, but I can’t just keep escaping to my imagination and ignoring issues in the present.

Before I went back to sleep, my phone rang and somebody needed a lift. This is what caused the change and made me turn the day around. I thought, if I have to get changed to take him somewhere and get ready for work later anyway, I might as well go into school. So I did, and although I missed the first hour of my double lesson, I managed to get some work done for the first time in a while.

Yesterday ended up being quite a productive day. I got some school work done, I tidied up the house, and I went to work and earned some money whilst training up to do more things. And none of it would’ve happened if I hadn’t had that phone call.

Motivation is what will kick start my days and make more days good ones rather than bad. I just need to learn where to find my motivation and not rely on fate to send me a phone call each time before I find it.

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